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Insult Machine

Copyright 1997

Opening Words

Welcome To Lawyer Insults and Fun.

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LAW,n Once Law was sitting on the bench, And Mercy knelt a-weeping. "Clear out!" he cried, "disordered wench! Nor come before me creeping. Upon your knees if you appear, 'Tis plain your have no standing here." Then Justice came. His Honor cried: "Your status? -- devil seize you!" "Amica curiae," she replied -- "Friend of the court, so please you." "Begone!" he shouted -- "there's the door -- I never saw your face before!"

G.J. LAWFUL, adj. Compatible with the will of a judge having jurisdiction.

LAWYER, n. One skilled in circumvention of the law.

(Devil's Dictionary by Ambrose Bierce 1911.)

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